Today I am posting pictures of the boys jumping on the trampoline yesterday with the sprinkler.  And the dog.  And the paint that is showing no sign of ever coming off.  But these pictures have nothing to do with the ramblings I'm about to let out.  They're just distractions to look at in case you're  bored but want to keep reading.

I have a problem in which I lose the keys.  A lot.  Often.  Always.  One time I lost them for like six months.  We had to make an extra complete set of my keys.  Then one day six months after I made the new set I was wearing a skirt to church that I hadn't worn in awhile.  Something was jingling in the pocket.  The lost keys.

This morning I decided to take the kids swimming at the community pool in our town.  I was pretty proud of myself for gathering everything, including a packed lunch, and getting the kids ready, the baby ready, and myself ready-- all set to leave in time to get there as soon as the pool opened.  Then I had to get the keys and we would be off.  But they were missing.  I checked in all the normal places:  the microwave stand, the kitchen counter by the sink, the top of the filing cabinet in the computer room, the computer desk.  Then I even checked some of the not normal places I sometimes leave the keys.  The top of the dresser, the bathroom sink.  But the keys were nowhere.

I wish I were the type of person who could just stop, breathe, perhaps say a prayer, and then calmly continue searching.  Actually, I wish I could be the type of person who could put the keys in the same spot all the time.  But I am neither of those people.  Instead, as I search, I get more frantic. And more frantic.  And more angry and more angry.  At myself, at Brice, at whoever happens to be the way of the searching.  Sometimes I swear.  Sometimes I throw things.  Today I did both of those things, and also added yelling, crying, and scaring/scarring children to the list.  

I said a prayer.  I tried to calm myself.  I sent the kids to their room to shield them from my searching frenzy/rage. But I never did find the keys.  Fortunately, a loving Father in Heaven enlightened my mind enough to remember to look for the before mentioned set of spare keys.  I don't know how He got through the seething, yelling, crying, undeserving brain of mine.  But I remembered those keys.  And regained my composure and we got to go the pool.

But seriously, why do I have to be so INSANE 90% of the time.  How will my kids ever remember the fun loving mom who takes pictures of them jumping on a trampoline, that they got to paint, when I freak out about lost keys?  And also why do I always lose the STUPID KEYS.

On the way to the pool Jace told me that when we got home we would have to search for the other keys.  So we wouldn't "waste keys like you always do, mommy."  Thanks buddy.  Thanks.  

The kids don't look too scarred, right?  And see how normal I'm pretending to be?

Well another example of how not normal I am happened after we got the pool.  There was this lady there that I see around town all the time it seems like.  Probably mostly at Walmart because I tend to go there a lot. . . and I have the remember-peoples-faces-forever curse.  So I see her everywhere. 

She is tall.

She is tan.

She is really pretty.

I noticed that she kept looking over at me, as I was unloading all of my belongings and getting kids set to swim.  And so maybe she recognized me, as well.  So I felt like maybe I should say something?  Like strike up a conversation?  Be friendly?  

So instead of saying something like, "It's a good day for swimming" or "Are those your kids over there?"  I say, "That's a really good color on you."

And then suddenly I find myself opening this flood gate wherein I cannot stop giving this lady compliments.  Good color.  You're so tan.  You don't look old enough to have son so big. YOU'RE SO PRETTY. (yeah, I'm pretty sure I really said that)

 Inside my mind I'm screaming, "JUST SHUT UP."

But I couldn't.  So I'm pretty sure that this lady who I see everywhere now thinks I'm in love with her.  And that she just got hit on.