Jacey Boy is 5!

I remember when he looked like this:

Going through old baby pictures make me tear up a little.  I can't believe he is 5 already.  Have I mentioned that I have occasional panic attacks about him starting school?  And if I think about it too much I start to get crazy and irrational and think about all sorts of insane and ridiculous things?

He is so ready for school, as far as the whole intellectual thing goes.  However I'm not so sure that he is ready as far as the whole being able to sit and listen to a teacher and not be crazy thing goes.  I was in primary the other day and he was acting, well, like other children I've once judged.  But he was my child.  And I was mortified.  He's been doing really well during sacrament meeting.  I guess by the time he is finished sitting quietly for that first hour he has too much energy built up and the only way he knows how to release is to act like a five year old boy.  A five year old boy hyped up on five cups of coffee.  So I guess maybe if we start working on him now on behaving better during primary he might be okay once school starts. . . or we'll just get a lot of notes sent home from the teacher.  And I'll have to go in and work out a behavior plan with the teacher.  Like I had to do with parents while I was teaching.  Because their children were driving me crazy in the classroom.  Oh no.  Karma really is going to come back and get me for all the times I wanted to strangle students who just couldn't sit still and listen to me.  

Jace still loves playing video games.  The other day on his DS he figured out how to make a flip book thing (like draw his own cartoon) and I was pretty impressed.  Especially since he figures all this stuff out without being able to read yet.  Trial and error I guess.  Although it does have its drawbacks.  Occasionally he deletes all his saved game progress because he just starts pushing button.  

Right now he is obsessed with angry birds.

He likes being the boss of Cameron, which is no surprise.

He loves to play in the sandbox and play in water.  And mud.  And anything dirty.

He asks a lot of deep questions lately, like about why Jesus created different things.  And what it will be like in heaven when we're resurrected.  Apparently he wants to be 4 when he's in heaven.  And live in a house that has all his same toys. Although I'm pretty sure that age will change now that he's 5.  And then again when he's 6. . .

He is so sweet with Olivia.  I really see his sweet sensitive loving side when he's around her.  If she's crying and I'm not in the same room I can hear him saying things like, "It's okay, Livvy.  Big brother is here.  I'll take care of you."

He's trying really hard to remember to be grateful for things, something we're working on so I don't always hear him asking for more. 

He is a happy boy.  Which I love about him.  He's always been a pretty happy little guy.

He's a goofy boy, too.  He loves making people laugh.  Which is why he talks about farting and poop a lot right now.  Because he's knows that will always get a good laugh out of his brother.

He has changed a lot in 5 years.  But his I-just-woke-up face is still pretty similar.  

And the thing that I love most about this sweet little boy is how forgiving he is.  I know that I make a lot of mistakes with him.  I lose my patience a lot.  I say no when I should just say yes.  I take a lot of my frustration with the middle child out on him when I know I shouldn't.  I yell when I should just let it go or ignore.  But he still loves me and want to cuddle with me.  He still wants to show me when he beats a new level in Mario or when he makes something cool in the sandbox.  He wants to tell me jokes and sit by me.  He wants me to read to him and lets me sing him songs.  He still lets me hug him and give him kisses (though only on the lips, because then he doesn't have to wipe it off). He always forgives me when I say that I'm sorry, and even when I don't.  I'm certain that his sweet and strong spirit was sent to our family first for a reason. 

I'm so grateful for 5 years with this little man, and for an eternity of them to come.