An almost smile.

Little Olivia is kind of a grumpy pants. A very cute and pretty grumpy pants.  She has smiled at me, but only like two or three times.  Usually in the morning when she's awake and not eating she will be content to sit and be happy, but after four in the afternoon if she's not asleep or eating, she's fussing.  She wants to be held and if you do not hold her then she will let you know how mad she is.  In fact, so far there have been three times when she screamed so loud and so long that she turned purple and pretty much almost passed out.  Which is scary.  I know if she faints she will just start breathing, but its still scary and I still don't want that to happen.  So I'm afraid to let her get too mad.  Which means getting her to go to sleep on her own eventually will be difficult.  

I was trying so hard to get her to smile.  And she just kept giving me this look like, "Really, Mom?"

Today was kind of a rough day.  

I got a clogged milk duct/mastitis yesterday. I don't think its full blown mastitis, but it was a clogged duct that bothered me enough to make me get a fever and feel all achy and like I had the flu.  But I got the clog out last night and started feeling a little better today, though not completely. So I was exhausted and not feeling well today.  And then the boys woke up bright and early.  But not really "bright" and early, since it was still dark.

I remember like a year ago when I put a post on here was like, "I'm soooo lucky.  My boys sleep till eight or eight thirty blah blah blah blah"  

I think I wish I could go back and punch that stupid girl in the face, or at least make her knock on wood.  Because now we are lucky if they sleep past six.  

And here is what happens to a two year old when he wakes up at 5:45.

And here is what happens when that two year old who woke up at 5:45 refuses to take a nap.

And Jace is fine with being tired as long as he has some kind of gaming device in his hand.  But take it away and you've got a whining, mean to his brother, irrational four year old.    

So I have no choice but to put the boys to bed extremely early.  And Jace usually falls asleep within minutes.  Cameron takes a bit longer, but usually he's had a nap during the day.  Brice thinks that if we keep them up  later at night, then they'll sleep longer.  But that hasn't proven to be the case.  

We finally took Olivia to church this last Sunday.  I surprised Brice and myself by getting there with the three kids ten minutes early ALL BY MYSELF.  

That will probably  never happen again.  It must have just been some kind of first-time-taking-a-cute-little-girl-to-church adrenalin.